?

Log in

whoaaa.. do you smell that?! [entries|friends|calendar]
i_lick_markers

[ userinfo | livejournal userinfo ]
[ calendar | livejournal calendar ]

[26 May 2006|02:24pm]

heartoffenris
[ mood | Carpet ]

Hi...We likes carpet...carpet feels niice...We likes all carpet...we likes yellow snow too...

Lol,j/k.We are new here and wanted our first post to be rememberable...CARPET!

post comment

New. [12 Nov 2005|10:35pm]

queen_of_ena
When I was 3 my older brother convinced me to lick some scented markers. Now mind you, they smell wonderful but I was very disappointed when I found that the lemon, didn't actually taste like lemon, but rather something quite the opposite of what I had expected.

Following my dear brother's encouragement, I tasted/licked not only the lemon marker, but the orange, apple, mint, grape, raspberry, cherry, cinnamon, mango, watermelon and even the black licorice markers too.


I'm still quite disappointed to this day that they didn't taste like they smelt.

I also had the habit of chewing on pencilcrayons and erasers. At the time I thought they tasted fine :)
2 comments|post comment

"i cry to the ally, confess all to the rain, but i lie... lie to the mirror..." [01 Aug 2005|01:37am]

clearblueglare
[ mood | accomplished ]

when i was younger, and occasionly to this day when i am feeling sassy. i lyked to eat crayons, lead soldiers, the occasional paint chip, glue (i have always loved that consistancy), paper, and beginning last year rubber cement. i also think it is splendid that if you lick the the little fiddlestick markers that smell cool, they actually taste lyke what they're supposed to smell lyke. Lemon being the strongest next to the minty one in my opinion.

:}

2 comments|post comment

A post from hellojeffy: [10 Jun 2005|01:33pm]

surrealkiller
[ mood | excited ]

Dear Friends. I am collecting love letters for a project I am working on called 99 Love Leters.

The idea here is to collect 99 love letters. Each "letter" should be a photocopy of one side of one page. All names should be removed to preserve anonymity. Any expression of love goes.. Letter, Drawing, Painting.. Anything. Then, once all the letters are collected, we will connect them to 99 red balloons and release them in the heart of the city.

Yes, that is a play off of Nena's 99 Luftballons..

The objective is to reach at least 1 or 2 lonely or heart broken souls out there. There will be a contact email on the letter so we can take in a response.

If all goes well I'll be doing this annually in different cities. I'm hoping to get all the letters and prep work done my midsummer. So If you have a love letter or three or more you think would suit our little project photo copy it and give/mail it to me. If you need my land address or have a comment/question please email me at..hellojeffy@yahoo.com.

ALERT TO ANIMAL LOVERS/ENVIORNMENTAL CONSERVATIONSITS:

We are aware of the concearns you may have, so for your piece of mind I have included a link:

http://www.balloonartists.com.au/environment.htm
post comment

Woowee.... [27 May 2005|09:37am]

surrealkiller
[ mood | crazy ]

I lick MARKERS!

post comment

Poor girls... [18 Jun 2004|12:41pm]
nnoraa
3 comments|post comment

[17 Jun 2004|12:57am]
nnoraa
hellooooooooo ... anyone out there?!!!??!!!

i took a killer pooper today.... was like 5 feet long and ish...

no i didn't .. just kidding lol...
you liked that didn't you


yaa...

You want some of this??... How about a lil of THAT! .. yeahh uh huh...

=)

keep on trucking.. later kiddos
post comment

Hello. [19 May 2004|06:16pm]

eeasm_jessica
[ mood | amused ]

This community makes me giggle.  Heehee.

I have a friend who eats lots of paper.  I thought that was quite impressive.  She's written reviews for different paper too - go here if you're interested.

Oh and I started a creepy stalker appreciation society for one of my friends, very amusing, it's called the EEAS.  Let me know if you want to join!

But yeah... LONG LIVE TOILET HUMOUR!

1 comment|post comment

[06 May 2004|10:22am]
drummbumm
[ mood | amused ]

whoa yea i see that other people have joined this community lol.. thats so cool! UPDATE! write what you please!!

i think its so funny, i didnt think people were actually going to join! WOO!

post comment

[08 Apr 2004|08:40pm]
nnoraa
How to Poop at Work

We've all been there but don't like to admit it. We've all kicked back in our cubicles and suddenly felt something brew down below. As much as we try to convince ourselves otherwise, the WORK POOP is inevitable. For those who hate pooping at work, following is the 2001 Survival Guide for taking a dump at work. Memorize these definitions and pooping at work will become a pure pleasure.

ESCAPEE.
Definition: a fart that slips out while taking a leak at the urinal or forcing a poop in a stall. This is usually accompanied by a sudden wave of panic embarrassment. This is similar to the hot flash you receive when passing an unseen police car and speeding. If you release an escapee, do not acknowledge it. Pretend it did not happen. If you are standing next to the farter in the urinal, pretend you did not hear it. No one likes an escapee, it is uncomfortable for all involved. Making a joke or laughing makes both parties feel uneasy.

JAILBREAK (Used in conjunction with ESCAPEE).
Definition: When forcing poop, several farts slip out at a machine gun pace. This is usually a side effect of diarrhea or a hangover. If this should happen, do not panic. Remain in the stall until everyone has left the bathroom so to spare everyone the awkwardness of what just occurred.

COURTESY FLUSH.
Definition: The act of flushing the toilet the instant the nose cone of the poop log hits the water and the poop is whisked away to an undisclosed location. This reduces the amount of air time the poop has to stink up the bathroom. This can help you avoid being caught doing the WALK OF SHAME.

WALK OF SHAME.
Definition: Walking from the stall, to the sink, to the door after you have just stunk up the bathroom. This can be a very uncomfortable moment if someone walks in and busts you. As with all farts, it is best to pretend that the smell does not exist. Can be avoided with the use of the COURTESY FLUSH.

OUT OF THE CLOSET POOPER.
Definition: A colleague who poops at work and damn proud of it. You will often see an Out Of The Closet Pooper enter the bathroom with a newspaper or magazine under their arm. Always look around the office for the Out Of The Closet Pooper before entering the bathroom.

THE POOPING FRIENDS NETWORK (PFN).
Definition: A group of coworkers who band together to ensure emergency pooping goes off without incident. This group can help you to monitor the whereabouts of Out Of The Closet Poopers, and identify SAFE HAVENS.

SAFE HAVENS.
Definition: A seldom used bathroom somewhere in the building where you can least expect visitors. Try floors that are predominantly of the opposite sex. This will reduce the odds of a pooper of your sex entering the bathroom.

TURD BURGLAR:
Definition: A pooper who does not realize that you are in the stall and tries to force the door open. This is one of the most shocking and vulnerable moments that can occur when taking a dump at work. If this occurs, remain in the stall until the Turd Burglar leaves. This way you will avoid all uncomfortable eye contact.

CAMO-COUGH.
Definition: A phony cough that alerts all new entrants into the bathroom that you are in a stall. This can be used to cover-up a WATERMELON, or to alert potential Turd Burglars. Very effective when used in conjunction with an ASTAIRE.

ASTAIRE.
Definition: A subtle toe-tap that is used to alert potential Turd Burglars that you are occupying a stall. This will remove all doubt that the stall is occupied. If you hear an Astaire, leave the bathroom immediately so the pooper can poop in peace.

WATERMELON.
Definition: A turd that creates a loud splash when hitting the toilet water. This is also an embarrassing incident. If you feel a Watermelon coming on, create a diversion. See CAMO-COUGH.

HAVANA OMELET.
Definition: A load of diarrhea that creates a series of loud splashes in the toilet water. Often accompanied by an Escapee. Try using a Camo-Cough with an Astaire.

UNCLE TED.
Definition: A bathroom user who seems to linger around forever. Could spend extended lengths of time in front of the mirror or sitting on the pot. An Uncle Ted makes it difficult to relax while on the crapper, as you should always wait to drop your load when the bathroom is empty. This benefits you as well as the other bathroom attendees.

FLY BY.
Definition: The act of scouting out a bathroom before pooping. Walk in and check for other poopers. If there are others in the bathroom, leave and come back again. Be careful not to become a FREQUENT FLYER. People may become suspicious if they catch you constantly going into the bathroom.
1 comment|post comment

navigation
[ viewing | most recent entries ]